Search This Blog

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

To Laugh or to Cry?

The past week during Patrick's sheep hunt absence, there were a few moments when I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry.

For any of you who have been around Stuey in the past 6 months, you know that he can be a handful. He has an endearing side, but he also has this stubborn, rebellious side that is hard to contend with. He needs super firm boundaries.

He has had a thing with reaching for door handles, buttons, etc on walls in public places. Not sure why he can't control himself, but before I know it, his hands are all over things which he shouldn't be touching. When I've talked to him about it in the past, he says, "I tell my hands, don't do that-but they don't listen to me." I told him he needed to be firmer in conversations with his hands.

Last Friday, he pulled the grand-daddy of levers--a fire alarm. At the Alutiiq museum. I was absolutely horrified. We went down to pick something up and in the foyer stuey pulled the alarm. The alarms went off, everyone evacuated the building. I stood on the sidewalk crying, feeling like a failure of a mom. I put Stuey in the car and he was crying. April came over to me and consoled me and told me that she did it when she was a kid. I felt like such a failure of a mom for that moment--not catching him sooner in the act.

Then on Monday, I dropped him off to his first day of preschool for the year. When I dropped Stuey off, he told the teachers that he was going to go to kindergarten at St. Mary's--and I had to explain that he meant next year--and that Nora is going to St. Mary's and Stuey is excited about it.

When I picked Stuey up in the afternoon, he was in the yellow time out chair in the corner with a mad look on his face. I knew something had gone terribly wrong, as Stuey has never had discipline problems before at preschool. The teacher exused herself from the rest of the group to speak to me and explained the downfalls of Stuey's day.

"The day started off good, but then it went downhill after lunch...Stuey peed in the lawn and laughed while he was doing it, then he raced across the driveway here without listening to us and he hasn't listened well in group this afternoon..." She went on to say that Stuey would say in a strong voice, "I"m going to kindergarten at ST. Mary's". He believed that if he acted bad at preschool, he would get kicked out and sent to St. Mary's. The teachers and I explained that if he has time outs, the teachers at ST. Mary's won't accept him. His eyes got big and I think he got it!!

Since then he has had two days of preschool with no further discipline problems. Thank heavens. He is on a roll now with good preschool behavior once again. His cousin, Z., starts on Monday at the same preschool which will be very exciting for both of them!



Jessy said...

I'm sorry things have been hard lately! But don't feel like a bad mom. We all have those moments, and we just can't always control what our children will do. Some day you and Stuey will be laughing about the fire alarm! I know I did a little. Good luck.

Jowers Inc. said...

Why are number 2 children so eager to test the rules? It is this way in our house as well making it a constant struggle to eliminate bad behavior and attitudes. Some days I feel so helpless as a mother. I know that one day, she will just mature and understand that the rules were for her safety and well being, then we will be okay. Hang in there.