Thoughts from Zoya

It sure is hard seeing my little guy still hooked up to antibiotics and tubes. When I go visit him there is often a little shock time where I have to re-adjust myself to the fact that he is still a sick little guy needing oxgen, IV pokes, etc....the nurses remind me that he won't remember any of it. He is such a trooper, I tell you!

I was able to look through his chart this morning and see the docs dictations on him from the past several days. Seems like they are treating a myriad of symptoms and calling it possible Respiratory distress syndrome, possible pneumonia (being treated with 4 MORE days of antibiotics...). Doesn't seem to be one clear, Angels-coming-down-from-the-sky-type-of-diagnosis. Good news is that he contniues to decrease his O2 needs. Now we just want his respiratory rate to go down so I can begin breastfeeding.

People have been so fantastically supportive! Yesterday Ingrid Kubiak visited ( a friend from my childhood in Kodiak). She brought her camera and took the wonderful photos you saw on the website yesterda. Thanks Ingrid! It was good to catch up with her-its been years since we've seen eachother.

I saw Brian Davis and his sister. They took me to Mooses Tooth for lunch and we had fun conversation and I had my first beer in LONG time. Raspberry wheat. Boy was it yummy!!!

My sister, Brother in law and nephews have blessed me with MANY visits, many meals, a car.....they've been amazing. So supportive and loving. Bonnie made a pharmacy run the second day I was here for various odds and ends I needed...bless her heart.

Last night I saw Buck and Alexis Furin who both live in Anchorage. Buck is a childhood friend and Aleis is his wife AND a night nurse in the NICU. So its been good to have a familiar face in the unit on night shifts. We're hoping we can arrange to have Stuey on her schedule on her next shift. That'd be super.

Everyone who has come by has seen little Stuey, so thats been fun.

Yesterday when I held Stuart, he opened his eyes big and wide and looked around for about half an hour. IT was wonderful! It brought tears to my eyes, as I realized it was the first time I had seen him with him looking around like that! He has been sleeping and healing So Hard the past few days. Lets just say I was in HEAVEN being able to look into his eyes.

And Patrick is Daddio Fabbio in Kodiak. Man, I picked a good man for a husband. He is doing so wonderfully with Nora. When we talk I get the daily update of what Nora ate (or didn't eat) for various meals, what cabinets, books etc, she is getting into, what she did to the dog....dirty diaper update, I love hearing all the details. And I can't wait to get home with Stuart. Two days ago, it suddenly dawned on my "I"m a mother of 2 kids". I think for several days there I have been so focused on Stuart that it hadn't dawned on me yet that in a few days I'll be a mom at home with 2 kids. Our family is complete!

As for me- I'm doing well and taking care of myself. I"m getting good sleep, resting, eating and taking it slow. The staff is VERY supportive and wonderful here and seeing family and friends has be sooo great. Helps break the day up a bit and it is good to see people I haven't seen for a while! (ZAS)