Sunday, June 19, 2011
Good Cop, Bad Cop---Crackdown time at the Saltonstalls!
Lately at the Saltonstall House we've had a stage of good kid/"bad" kid and good cop/bad cop.
Our kids tend to take turns being "good" and "bad"....One day its Stuey, the next its Nora. For some reason, the past month or so, its been particularly bad. Its exhausting--some mornings I think, (and sometimes say) "Can both of you please be in a good mood?". It really can be draining.
Patrick and I have been having "good cop/bad cop" challenges with parenting lately. He thinks kids should be locked in their bedroom when they're bad, I think they should lose stickers off their sticker chart and get toys taken to the thrift store.
Today we had an episode of Nora getting VERY upset after losing her small easter hello kitty to the thrift store--Stuey has lost lots of toys to the thrift store, but when it comes time for Nora to lose a toy, Patrick often comes to her rescue. He says, "Oh, Now Zoya, thats so mean..." and ends up coming to Nora's rescue and not letting me take the toy to the thrift store.
Today, I knew we had to follow through....I gave Nora several warnings and she had pinched Stuey. She needed to know that consequences really happen to her--she is 5 years old (close to 6) and I could see she was totally stunned to watch her hello kitty leave for the thrift store pile. She kept running over to Patrick trying to talk him into giving it back to her. I think he knew that we had to stand on the same ground (as hard as it was for him to watch). Ahhh....parenting. It is such a balancing act. From what I hear from friends, there often is a little "good cop, bad cop" syndrome in households with parents. We're still trying to figure out the balance in our house...I think for now we agreed that I shouldn't take any toys that are SUPER sentimental. I agree with that. He said it is the equivalent of taking away a puppy. Good analogy, Patrick! :)
The good news is that the rest of today went significnatly smoother and Nora seemed to be on better behavior--especially when I mentioned another toy possibly leaving...
Photos are from our trip to Ft. Abercrombie beach today. It was soooo picturesque. Flat calm. Sunny. Kids played in the sand and waded in the ocean (and Patrick even went swimming! Brrr!!!!)